They wouldn’t dream of appearing in fake tan and prosthetic nails, although I obviously insist on them.” To present the programme, she must presumably be a-brim with esoterica; apparently not.“It’s easy for me to appear terribly knowledgeable when I roll my eyes and say: 'No, no, you fool, it was 12th-century Venice!There we are doing crosswords and giggling or eating beans or watching a DVD together while I play poker on my i Pad and it’s just lovely.” Coren is refreshingly up-front on the subject of babies and trying for a family; she dotes on her brother’s children, who live nearby.
For a couple whose brand of humour is shot through with cynicism, there was something quite heart-warming about the fact that they didn’t tie the knot clad in downbeat civvies and an air of post-modern ennui.
In the event, he wore a conventional morning suit and she a fabulous white gown with spangles and a train the length of the Flying Scotsman.
“One of my bridesmaids took me into a bridalwear shop, just so I knew what I would be rejecting, and I stomped along thinking: 'This is ridiculous, I’ll look stupid’,” she chuckles.
“Six weeks later, I’m a complete bridezilla back in the shop shouting: 'I want the tiara and the veil and a huge train!
Despite being happily married to a diffident clever-clogs of my own, even I secretly hoped I might be in with a chance, were Mitchell and I to stumble across one another by the seminal 1911 edition of the Encyclopaedia Britannica at the British Library.
When television presenter and world-class poker player Victoria Coren, 41, wed comedy genius and panel-show regular David Mitchell, 39, last year, a wail of anguish rose up from tertiary-level-educated women everywhere, who had been smitten by the groom’s erudition, dry humour and awkward middle-class diffidence.
“But I’m very much enjoying being a newlywed and I don’t think I’m capable of any more decisions right now.
At the moment, I can’t even choose between planting blue or yellow iris bulbs for the spring.” But imagine, Victoria, how terrifyingly clever your children would be?
The air of unassailable confidence bestowed by an independent education gives every statement the ring of certainty (whether she feels it or not).